This is not about baby showers.
Taking showers with Griffin was one of the earliest ways that he and I bonded, and remains one of my favorite ways to hang out with him while getting something useful done at the same time. Â I’ve been meaning to write this post for more than a year, since I figure other new parents might want to try this too.
I remember being afraid of showers when I was a little kid. Â Baths were the norm, and showers were scary grown-up things. Â I don’t remember when that shifted, but I was definitely still mostly taking baths in elementary school. Â When Griffin was born I assumed that this fear was hard-wired, and that was why everyone only talked about giving babies baths. Â But Griffin hated baths. Â We had the mini tub for him, but it was hard to keep the temperature constant with so little water (and our house was often cold in Oakland). Â When I was in charge of a solo bath it usually end with Griffin crying, my knees hurting, and both of us wet and cold. Â Bleh.
One day in the blurry early weeks of no-sleep, Â I was up early with Griffin and he was having a hard time — teething, indigestion, grumpiness, who knows. He was loudly voicing his discontent with the world. Â I was tired of walking around the apartment trying to calm him down, and I felt gross, so I brought him into the shower. Â I felt a bit edgy, like, “I wonder if I should check one of the baby books before I do this?” Â As usual, I didn’t check the book and decided to experiment. Â As soon as Griffin was enveloped in the steam, he stopped crying. Â He snuggled up against my shoulder and just lay there quietly. Â I let the water splash on him and run down his back. Â He seemed happy! Â After a while he reached out and tried to grab the spray. Â He giggled. Â I giggled. Â Our morning was transformed.
That first time neither of us got much of a wash. Â I didn’t want to drop him or get soap in his eyes or otherwise ruin the moment. Â Pretty soon, however, he and I were taking showers all the time. Â In the morning, I would scoop him up and take him in with me. Â Often he was happy playing at the back of the tub while I washed. Â If I was done with the soap, I would let the tub fill up a bit so he could splash around. Â I could get out and get dressed while he continued playing.
Nowadays, Griffin enjoys real baths too, and we have a bigger tub here so sometimes I join him. Â But he and I still take showers together regularly. Â I even have a steam-free shower-mirror so that I can shave while he’s playing (he likes watching the shaving cream slide down the drain). Â After I’m done, I always pick him up for some snuggle time and we both laugh together as he tries to catch the water and causes it to spray all over. Â These happy moments go a long way toward preserving my sanity in the face of toddler moods.