Tag Archives: Mommy reflections

Dear Griffin

Dear Griffin,

You and I have been home during the day by ourselves for three weeks now. Daddy is extremely busy with school since after the first day of classes he was reassigned to teaching eighth grade history and English in addition to reading (which he’s taught for four years). He’s also trying to finish his master’s degree thesis in addition to being your dad, so he’s definitely got his hands full. I am not teaching kindergarten this year, the grade I’ve been teaching for four years, so that I can stay home and take care of you. You, my little five month old, keep me busy and challenge me in ways no class of 20 five-year-olds ever has. I wouldn’t trade it for anything, though. I am so glad we’re spending so much time together.

Today you nearly decided to wipe “nap” off of your to-do list, but after a little time in your crib alone, you’ve finally drifted off. I think life is just too darn exciting for you to want to sleep. You’ve been eating like crazy, multiple ten-ounce bottles at a time, so I think you’re going through a growth spurt. You have six teeth, with two more possibly coming in. This is extremely early for a guy your age, so I’m thinking of starting you on mushed up food soon. You’reĀ  always very interested in watching me eat and want to grab whatever it is I have and put it in your mouth. You’re not very discerning about what you put in your mouth, though, so maybe I’ve just decided it’s time for you to start on some food. You are extremely good at rolling and have been scooting yourself all over the floor lately. It’s only a matter of time before you figure out how to crawl. We’ve been working on sitting up lately and you don’t really like it too much, but I suspect you’ll like it soon enough.

You laugh a lot lately. There’s something very funny on your wall, but I don’t know what it is. Is it the giant ant? The strawberry? You LOVE the fish mobile above your changing table. It helps keep you distracted while I put on a fresh diaper. Many times, you would prefer to go without a diaper. Naked time is one of your favorite pastimes. I let you go without clothes and diaper at least a couple of times a day and you are just happy as a clam. Last night after you had your clothes-less time, I got you in your jammies and we laid on the futon and read books for a whole hour. You really love the books Baby’s Birthday Cake and Where’s Mommy? They have flaps that you can help me lift as the baby looks for his cake and his mommy. Much to my surprise, you are actually quite good at lifting the flaps, and I’m discovering you have a clear preference for books that are interactive. I tried reading you just a plain old story and you got frustrated. As soon as I read one that you could participate in, you were much happier, which looks like you flapping your arms up and down and kicking your legs.Reading

You can manipulate things with your hands much better than you could a month ago. You pick things up, put them in your mouth, and pass them from one hand to the other. You really like touching my face while you’re breastfeeding or eating from the bottle. You grab my nose, cheeks, and lips and think it’s extremely funny when I yell “ouch!” You are also using your feet to explore the world. Much to your delight, you recently discovered that by kicking the arches on your play mat, it makes everything move.

You are a really, really great baby, often very flexible and accommodating. Sometimes you are grumpy, though, and it’s frustrating for both of us. You’ve gotten into the habit, when you’re over-tired and hungry, of sucking on the bottle a few times and then crying for 30 seconds, sucking on the bottle, crying, over and over. It usually happens at the end of the day when we’re both exhausted. I’ve had to leave you in your crib crying a couple of times as our frustrations played off of one another. It makes me feel like a less-than-adequate mom, but those few minutes apart are usually enough for me to cool off and for you to decide you really do want to eat and go to sleep.5MonthsOld

Thank goodness we’re here together. I don’t know what my life would have been without you. You’ve got a smile that stops my heart and a face that makes me melt with love. I love watching you discover the world and can’t wait to see what’s next.

Love,

Mama

New Old Game

Now that I’m working as a mom instead of a teacher, I have taken on more of the household duties. Andrew and I feel a bit like we’ve stepped into a time warp, and it still feels a little weird to both of us. To be fair, we had decided that whichever one of us stayed home with Griffin, that person would end up with more of the household responsibilities, but it still feels strange sometimes to be fitting into these fairly traditional stereotypes.

Laundry has been the duty that has changed the most. Our hamper has never been so empty! I thought washing Griffin’s cloth diapers would make our infrequent laundry leanings even worse, but to the contrary, it has actually facilitated more frequent washings of everything. Naturally, Griffin accompanies me down to the basement and keeps me company as I sort, fold, and put clean laundry away.

Griffin peeks out from under a pile of clean diapers.
Griffin peeks out from under a pile of clean diapers.

Yesterday, I discovered that Griffin loves a game that I used to love when I was little. Anytime my mom would change the sheets on my parents’ bed, I would delight in laying on the fitted sheet while she would float the top sheet over me like a parachute. I always loved the feeling of the crisp, cool sheet coming down on me and wanted her to do it over and over. Laundry is much more fun now that Griffin thinks this new old game is great, too.

Griffin is under there somewhere!
Griffin is under there somewhere!
Griffin waits for the sheet to fall on him.
Griffin waits for the sheet to fall on him.
There he is! So much fun.
There he is! So much fun.

Four Month Thoughts

Griffin is four months old, and he is continuing to amaze me. I know as his mother that’s what is supposed to happen, but it’s not just an admiration of him; it’s amazement at human beings in general. All of a sudden, the world seems so much more delicate, people so much more precious. That we all started this way is something of a miracle to me, and I hope to do right by him as his mom. I cannot wait to see what impact the world has on him, and what impact he has on the world. Most of all, I hope to remember to always be amazed by the little things, as awed as I am by the recognition in his eyes and the smile that breaks out on his face when he wakes in the morning to see that we’re all still here and life is wonderful.

Griffin wakes up after his first night camping.
Griffin wakes up after his first night camping.

Birth Story

I am sitting here on the now constantly used couch in beautiful sunshine thinking about how three weeks ago today, at nearly this hour, Griffin came into our world. Three weeks is such a small amount of time, but it feels as though he has been a part of our lives for much longer. He is wrapped to my chest as he sleeps, squeaking and cooing (and sometimes sounding like a dinosaur) and I can think of no better feeling than this.

Andrew has set up a blog for our family and we’ve been wanting to start writing entries for, well, three weeks now. I only recently have felt like I have the energy to sit and type up some of my thoughts about his birth. The actual labor feels like a distant memory already, so I thought I should get it down sooner rather than later.

Continue reading Birth Story