Earlier this year, the kids agreed to cook at least one dinner per week for the family. They have chosen a number of bold recipes, including their first lasagna this week! It was delicious.


Mundane details of life.
Earlier this year, the kids agreed to cook at least one dinner per week for the family. They have chosen a number of bold recipes, including their first lasagna this week! It was delicious.
I think I may have the perfect example ever of how parenting is so freaking hard with 3 different ages:
I just got all three of my kids to get ready for an outdoor adventure by pretending I was Phil from the Amazing Race, and the winner of getting totally ready (outdoor clothes, snack, water bottle, sunglasses) would get a $5 snack of their choice purchased at a snack bar. AND GO!
This resulted in oldest child minding his own business and doing the assignment, middle and youngest trying to hurt each other and keep the other from finishing, which resulted in tears and fury. Two out of three children in tears, oldest proclaiming: “THAT WAS SO FUN! WE NEED TO DO THIS MORE OFTEN!” and youngest two arguing about who should have won and gotten “penalties” for being mean and/or already partially ready. OMG.
BUT: all three children are ready, and EVERYONE WINS! THIS IS A NON-ELIMINATION ROUND AND EVERYONE GETS A $5 SNACK!
I cannot stop laughing at myself.
A highly unusual event occurred last night while reading Treasure Island aloud with Griffin and Maggie. We came across this passage:
Among the fallen rocks the breakers spouted and bellowed; loud reverberations, heavy sprays flying and falling, succeeded one another from second to second; and I saw myself, if I ventured nearer, dashed to death upon the rough shore or spending my strength in vain to scale the beetling crags.
Like many other passages, there were some words here that the kids didn’t know, but I was also perplexed by the adjective, beetling. We guessed from the context that it might mean steep or slippery or only climbable by beetles. I pulled out my phone and looked it up on my trusty Merriam-Webster app:
The example sentence is the very sentence we had read! We were all quite astonished by the coincidence.
Oliver is nearly half way through his fourth year. As such, he is changing even more rapidly than his siblings. This post is a summary of things we have observed recently.
Some additions from Griffin and Maggie:
Weaning off the bottle is a tough step for us. We embrace lots of other tough parenting moments with gusto, but both Sarah and I love the bottle of milk before bed. Partly, bedtimes are so hard already. Our system is smooth and it’s still hard. I’m tired. Sarah’s tired. There are dishes to do. The kids are exhausted and needy. Being able to snuggle up with Oliver and a bottle is a lovely way to close out the day.
But, we’ve been putting it off for six months (maybe more?) and we know it will just get worse once school begins. So, on Monday we told Oliver that the bottles were going bye bye. He said farewell to them. We introduced a sippy cup of milk that we can have downstairs before brushing teeth. Then we took him upstairs, read a few books, and put him to bed.
It’s been shockingly painless. He’s had one or two hard ones, but mostly the week has been straightforward. Knock on wood.
One weird thing: he’s not interested in the cup of milk. He sorta sipped at it for the first day or two, but by the end of the week he was heartily rejecting it. He just wants some water and maybe a snack. Then he’s ready. Not sure what that’s all about since he was accustomed to guzzling a solid 8-oz bottle at naptime and bedtime.
Mini-humans are weird.
In the evenings at our house, in those interminable minutes while we try to finish preparing dinner, the two older kids are often “bored” and don’t know what to do with themselves. Recently, Griffin shuffled into the kitchen and asked me forlornly, “Daddy, what can I do right now?” He wasn’t asking, “How can I help?” No, this was a bitter expression of hopelessness in the face of far too few minutes of screen time.
I usually reply with something snarky like, “Go stare at a wall!” (Never very effective, but surprisingly satisfying.) Last week, however, I came up with something new. Perhaps a parenting lesson from ECFEÂ finally sank in. Or maybe it arose from the fact that I was facilitating an immersive “design thinking” week at school. Instead of snark or exasperation, I said, “YES! Quick, get a piece of paper and a pen. Draw a shape that represents you in a color that represents your mood!” (I was riffing off of an icebreaker from a recent workshop.) Startled by my specificity, Griffin immediately went to his desk and did it, coming back with a multicolored blob that included a variety of emotions (including “hungry” and “bored,” but also some positive ones). Then he asked for another “art challenge.” And I heard the distant sound of angels singing.
Art challenges have become a fun new activity to keep the gremlins of our witching hour at bay. Maggie, of course, joined in too. Below are a couple of examples of their responses to my challenges from the last few days.
I’m not deluded enough to imagine that this will work forever, but I’m enjoying it while it lasts. And I do love watching their artwork evolve.
Sarah wrote this up for our first non-family babysitter for Oliver. It sums up where our bedtime routine stands now. We’re loving it–short, simply, and successful.
Oliver
Oliver’s bedtime is anywhere between 6-7:30pm, depending on how tired he seems. Signs that he’s ready for bed include crankiness, rubbing his eyes, heavy eyelids, general discontent, arching his back, etc. Once it’s clear he’s ready for bed, here’s what we do:
Maggie & Griffin
Bedtime for these guys is 7:30pm, unless Oliver is still falling asleep. We try to put Oliver down before they’re ready for bed, but sometimes it doesn’t work that way. We start them getting ready for bed around 7 or 7:15pm. Their jobs are:
Their routine sometimes includes time for read aloud, but if you are busy putting Oliver to bed, I would encourage them to get into their PJs, brush their teeth, and take a little quiet reading time on our bed, if it’s available, or the back bedroom. They are sometimes really amped before bed and goof off in their beds, which sometimes wakes Oliver. Please remind them that it’s silent time once they’re in their room!
Oliver must have read last week’s post about how we would just put him in his crib and he would magically sleep through the night.
Boring!
This week he’s trying out a new thing: having a harder time falling asleep and waking up crying every 30-minutes or so starting at 3-ish. Fun times.