Tag Archives: Things to Remember

Project Runway, Here We Come!

Griffin, much occupied with career thoughts these days, is now considering the world of fashion design. Two hours before attending a wedding yesterday, I went into my closet where I had set aside my best summery linen shirt for the occasion. Griffin, attempting to reboot my wardrobe, had made some alterations.

Griffin's first creation
Griffin’s first creation

Note the asymmetrical slashing—very fashion forward. Worried that I might fall back on other shirts, he proceeded through ten shirts with a similarly whimsical Jack-the-Ripper mystique. These were, in fact, my ten best shirts; I had put them at the front of the rack as I considered which shirt to wear to the wedding. (And, my wardrobe does not overflow with wedding garb.) Griffin astutely ignored the oversize denim and flannel, the maroon corduroy, the checkered seersucker, the ink-stained taupe, and any shirts missing buttons. Luckily for the bride and groom, my little fashionista missed a duplicate oxford at the far end of the rack, so I was able to attend the wedding in something other than my Republicans for Voldemort t-shirt.

Time to go shopping. And lock up the scissors.

Griffin Says Roundup

Griffin: “Could you please serve me some fruit?”
Me: “Sure!”
Griffin: “Now you’re my servant!”
Me: “Not so fast, Bucko.”

——

Me: “Griffin, you need to go outside. You’re starting to annoy me.”
Griffin: “But…!”
Me: “Go, now.”
<goes outside reluctantly>
Andrew (outside): “So I hear you’re being annoying.”
Griffin: “Yes I am.”

——

Griffin: “I’m going to become a mama soon.”
Me: “Oh? When is your baby coming?”
Griffin: “In April!”
Me: “What will you name your baby?”
Griffin: “Maggie Tulip! And she will be one, just like Maggie”
Me: “How will we tell them apart?”
Griffin: “Well, Maggie Tulip has red hair, like a tulip.”

——

Griffin: “Can you ask Mama to get some green beans on her way home from her trip?”
Andrew: “Well, she will be tired and doesn’t have a car, so I think we’ll just go shopping tomorrow.”
Griffin: “No, I mean, she can just ask the airplane to go to the store!”

——

Me: “Griffin, should we put different leg warmers on Maggie? Then she’ll look like Punky Brewster!”
Griffin: “A Pumpkin Rooster?!?!”

 

Maggie Busts a Move

Maggie, my parents, and I recently flew out to Oregon to attend a dear family friend’s wedding. It was a lovely day spent in the woods of the Pacific Northwest, but Maggie was beyond tired after dinner and we thought it was time to go as the evening set in. Just as we were preparing to say our goodbyes, the music started playing and Maggie perked up. Unprompted by anyone, she started tearing it up! The video I captured unfortunately missed some of her best moves, but you’ll get the idea. Next time the crankies are coming on, I think I’ll throw on some fast tunes and get her to dance!

http://youtu.be/IyePHWCEORI

Maggie’s Surprise Package

Maggie got a surprise package yesterday. Inside was this letter:

“June 8, 2012

Dear Maggie:

We haven’t met, but I saw your baby picture on Facebook the other day, and I was very excited! My name is Maggie, too…short for Margaret. There are not too many Margarets around anymore, and I wanted to send you this silverware. It belonged to your great-grandmother, Margaret Crutchfield Roy. Your great-grandparents, Andy and Margaret Roy, were Presbyterian missionaries and lived in exciting and wonderful places, and traveled all over the world. Over the years, they were given many interesting and amazing gifts of art and porcelain and ivory from China and Hong Kong. They lived long and happy lives. After Margaret died, your great uncle, Dr. David Roy, and my mom, Nancy Robertson, cleaned out the garage and the closets in the Pittsburgh apartment so that Andy Roy, who was almost 100 years old, could move to a smaller place.

David Roy was very generous and cavalier about giving away these items from his parent’s storage. He didn’t want them. He was sure that his brother, Stape, would not want them, and that your daddy and your uncles (who were young unmarried guys) would not want them. “Take them!” he said. “Take them all!” My mother and I loaded up her car with family heirlooms and knick-knacks and drove back to New Mexico where we live. We sorted the items fairly so that her sister, Aunt Sally (Robertson) Foster, could have some of the fascinating mementos for herself and for her children, too.

This silverware came to me because it is engraved with our name, Margaret. I believe it was given to your great-grandmother one piece at a time as she was growing up, by her relatives who loved her. When Margaret was a little girl over a hundred years ago, many young ladies were given nice silverware at Christmas and on their birthdays so that they might have a lovely set for entertaining when they were ready to marry and settle down. Margaret married, but her life was not one of settling down! They lived overseas for many years and usually ate with chopsticks. Margaret was not a materialistic person, but she kept this silverware from her childhood all of her life for sentimental reasons. I love this silver, but I have always thought that if Margaret Crutchfield Roy ever had a great-granddaughter (especially named Margaret) she would be very, very pleased for her to have it…to eat with, to play with, or to sell to pay for something she needs.

I loved and admired your great-grandmother, Margaret Roy, very much. She was an intelligent, gentle, and courageous woman who raised wonderful sons and made the world a better place. She was a role model to me because she was unafraid to go out in the world with the man she loved and do work that was important in spite of danger to her and her family. She was my great-aunt by marriage, and my father named me after her. I think we are lucky to share her name and heritage.

Love,
Maggie (Margaret Robertson-Linsky)”

The collection of silver forks, still in their original wrap.
Every piece is different, but they all are engraved with an “M” or “MC,” as shown here, for Margaret Crutchfield.

We are so excited to have a piece of Roy Family history, and especially to have something linked directly with Maggie’s namesake. We could not have been more surprised and touched by Maggie Robertson-Linsky’s thoughtfulness! What a treasure.

Za Za, Fuzzy Wuzzies, and the Three Billy Goats Gruff

Griffin, to my delight, loves a good story. Actually, quality isn’t the issue—mediocre stories will do. And I know that I shouldn’t be surprised because who doesn’t like a good story? But I do find real joy in the fact that we can share them together and that our made-up stories have evolved and shifted in ways I never planned, with Griffin engaged not just as audience but as creative partner. Below are three examples of how Griffin has helped shape our fictional landscape.

Za Za

Za Za was Griffin’s first recurring character, invented some time in the past 15 months. I can’t remember when Za Za started, but it was in this house, maybe around his second birthday. I think Griffin just created Za Za out of the blue one night while telling stories at bedtime. Za Za is not an imaginary friend, exactly, but originally seemed to be an alter-ego for Griffin. Griffin would ask us to tell him about Za Za which would prompt us to ask who “Za Za” was, but Griffin couldn’t say. After some questioning, we discovered that in Griffin’s mind, Za Za had done many of the things that Griffin had done that day. So if we had gone to the park, Griffin would want to hear about Za Za at the park. At first we stuck to this, and basically retold our days using Za Za as the protagonist. Griffin loved this and would jump in to add key moments from his day, “Then Za Za went down the BIG slide and bonked his head!” Riffing off of this we would talk about Za Za and Griffin playing together, as if Za Za had been with Griffin all day. Pretty soon I was fictionalizing things and Za Za became Griffin’s partner in numerous adventures across time and space. Sometimes Griffin wasn’t even necessary, so we might tell the story of Za Za and the pirates or the time Za Za went to the moon to deliver a package to the queen of the lunar mice. Recently, Za Za has faded in importance. Griffin still likes to invoke his name, but doesn’t need him to be a central character. I often use him as a framing device, so he becomes the narrator of another story involving other characters. Which brings us to the Fuzzy Wuzzies.

Fuzzy Wuzzies

Unlike Za Za, I remember exactly how the Fuzzy Wuzzies arrived on the scene, but I had no idea how important they would become.

First, some context. Most of our stories take place at bedtime after we’ve read a few books. We turn the lights out, cuddle up in bed (before Griffin’s loft and “big boy bed,” I would somehow cram myself into the crib) and tell a few stories or sing a few songs. At this point I am usually much more sleepy than Griffin. This casts a surreal tint on everything. It is not uncommon for me to fall asleep in mid-tale, at which point Griffin pokes me, “Hey! Daddy! Is that the end?” My imagination is already fairly weird and dark, in a fairy-tale sort of way, with lots of old D&D plots rolling around: all bridges have trolls under them, most plants are carnivorous (or at least poisonous), and every sidewalk square is a trap door to a subterranean lair. Compound this with sleep-visions and things get fairly outrageous. Sarah and I used to worry that some of my stories might be too scary for Griffin. He has always been fine with them, but the age of nightmares hasn’t really kicked in yet, so I want to be careful not to fill his sleepy head with fearful thoughts. The tension between my natural storytelling inclinations and my responsibility to keep Griffin safe and secure (both mentally and physically) creates a back-and-forth quality to some of our stories, a thematic dance between Dr. Seuss and H. P. Lovecraft, butterflies and lava pits.

Thus one fine night a year or so ago, I found myself telling Griffin a bedtime story about how he and Za Za were playing at  Mattocks Park, our neighborhood playground. They played on the swings, the see-saw, the climbing structure, and then went down one of the slides together. Suddenly, the ground opened up at the bottom of the slide and the two kids fell into a tunnel. The lid snapped shut behind them, and they tumbled down in darkness for a long time before landing in a heap in a dim cavern. They heard scuffling and snuffling noises in the darkness. Now we had a story! I was thrilled, but then thought I might be piling it on to thick. Looking back, this seems innocuous enough, but Griffin was younger and still a bit timid about slides, even without deadly trap-doors at the bottom. I needed a new story ingredient quick… something subterranean that scuffles and snuffles but isn’t scary. Out of the darkness emerged a rolling, smiling pile of Fuzzy Wuzzies. (Physical details are sketchy, but I was picturing something between a Star Trek tribble and Fizzgig from The Dark Crystal.) Fuzzy Wuzzies are shy creatures that live in extensive underground kingdoms linked to the surface world through secret doors. They come out when people aren’t around and particularly love parks and playgrounds. Griffin and Za Za were taken on a tour of Fuzzy Wuzzyland and eventually returned to Mattocks Park before any adults noticed they were gone. The Fuzzy Wuzzies promised that they could visit again some day.

Griffin was thrilled, and I was satisfied that I hadn’t generated any nightmare material. I figured that would be the end of it, but the next night Griffin wanted to hear about Za Za and the Fuzzy Wuzzies. In short order, the Fuzzy Wuzzies took leading roles in our nightly dramas. We’ve discovered entrances to Fuzzy Wuzzyland in remarkable places: Griffin’s closet, the back yard, the basement, a few public restrooms, and in pretty much every park in the Twin Cities. In Mattocks Park, in particular, Griffin has identified a number of secret entrances to Fuzzy Wuzzyland, and happily points out the “Fuzzy Wuzzy Tree” to befuddled playmates. The Fuzzy Wuzzies are also good friends with any other characters worth knowing in the fictional universe. They have introduced Za Za and Griffin to Sinbad the Sailor, Ali Baba, Puff, the three little pigs, and most recently, to three grumpy goats.

The Three Billy Goats Gruff

Ok, so this is just a minor tidbit, but since the number three is sacred in fairy tales, I figured I’d better tell three stories in this post. A few nights ago I was telling the story of “The Three Billy Goats Gruff.” It was Griffin’s first time hearing it, so I hammed it up as best I could. (Fuzzy Wuzzies and Za Za were, of course, involved.) As we approached the climax, with the third goat coming out onto the bridge, Griffin interrupted me: “The third goat is too BIG to fit in the troll’s mouth!” He was clearly very proud of his prediction, and while technically incorrect (the big goat butts the troll off the bridge), he exhibited a much deeper understanding of narrative structure than I would ever have expected. He understood that the third goat had to defeat the troll somehow and that his victory would be due to a feature already mentioned in the story. The only thing that differentiated the third goat was his size, so Griffin came up with a plausible explanation based on size that would prevent the troll from getting his meal.

I am staggered not by Griffin in particular, but by this example of how impressive the growing minds of children are.  Kids digest the hidden structures of language and culture around them at an astonishing rate. As a teacher I have worked with middle-schoolers who struggle to perceive the underlying structure of stories even when I’m explicitly revealing it to them. By that age they are distracted by so many other things, but a toddler’s mind is primed and ready. Cool.

Although I liked Griffin’s too-big-to-eat version, I figured he also needed to understand the importance of fight scenes (or how can he hope to unpack Hollywood?) so our old-fashioned goat sent the nasty troll into the river, howling all the way.

Haircut

As a child, I remember brushing my mom’s hair and imagined someday that I would have a child of my own who would want to brush my hair, too. Today, out of the blue, Griffin decided he needed to give me a “haircut” with the scooper from a backhoe loader. He carefully combed my hair and made spritzing sounds as he said, “Givin’ you a haircut!” I think that’s as close as I’m going to get with him, and I’ll take it.

Wedgies

Things to remember:

  • Griffin lately has been telling a story and then saying, “‘Member that?” (“Remember that?”) and then cracking up. If you say, “No, I don’t remember that,” he’ll say, “No…yes, I do!” Today at lunch, Griffin was telling a story, “‘Member that?” and then proceeded to say, “No sit! No sit! No sit!” over and over again, which, with his pronunciation sounded a lot more like, “No shit! No shit!” His story was just so dramatic and full of animation, Andrew and I couldn’t help but crack up.
  • On his way up to bed, Griffin pulls at the back of his underwear and says, “Look! I made a wedgie!”
  • Calling up from playing alone in the basement: “Daddy! I want to play Legos with my son Griffin!”
  • Spotting a nearly full moon: “Look! The moon! I can see a whole world in there!”
  • A little unclear on the pronouns: “Daddy come play with you?” (when he means me)
Andrew and Griffin built this together with lots of patience!
  • “Fank ouuuu!” (Thank you)
  • While folding laundry, Griffin puts on a pair of my underwear and proclaims, “Look! I’m fancy!”
Mr. Fancy Pants

 

 

The People Who Used to Blog A Lot

Hey. What happened to us over here? We used to write so much more than we have in the last few months. Heck, we didn’t even get the third leg of our huge trip to Europe *in June* properly documented, and it’s just snowballed from there. We’re feeling a little like slackers in the blogging department these days, but the lack of posts has been for an overarching big reason: we’ve been busy and life is full. We’ve been documenting lots of events with photos, but we haven’t even taken much time to sort through those…sigh. Andrew and I both really like to devote time to writing posts and making them fun for our friends and family to read, and time has seemed to be in shorter supply this autumn.

I’ve actually been thinking a lot about time and Facebook lately. As a stay-at-home parent, it has been a wonderful way for me to feel connected to people I love, to share the little daily things Griffin says or does, and sometimes (oftentimes) get immediate feedback (read: sympathy) for days that are less-than stellar. But Facebook goes away hourly. Things I write or read there are surely logged, but it’s not like a journal or this blog. I can’t really go back and reflect, and when it comes to my development as a parent and things I want to remember about Griffin’s rapid growing up, Facebook is no substitute for what we have here. This blog is absolutely for sharing with family and friends what we’ve been up to; but it is also, in many ways, taking the place of a memory book or journal that we will treasure for years. I feel like my time on Facebook has taken away some of the recording I would like to do with this blog, and I’m starting to rethink how I record our daily lives. Some of those little things that get put as status updates on Facebook are actually things I’d like to remember: Like the other day, I was in the basement doing laundry, and Griffin had stripped down naked and ran through the hall with maracas yelling, “It’s music time! It’s music time!” Or how he’s lately taken to flushing the toilet by saying, “Bye bye pee pees! Bye bye poo poos! I’m going to Griffin’s house! See ya tomorrow! Bye bye!” Or at breakfast on Friday, he asked for “more juice please? Hey Mama! I’m a good polite-er!” Those things are ending up as little anecdotes on Facebook, not being recorded for all of us to remember. I have visions of Griffin going back through our blog and reading about his life in his early years, and if I write it all down on Facebook, he’ll have nothing to read!

The point is not to give up Facebook. I think it helps me feel connected to adults in a life that is mainly devoted to toddlerhood, and I’m grateful for that. But I am going to try to change the way I blog. I’m trying something different where, instead of immediately recording little daily things on Facebook, I write them down as “Things to Remember” posts every once in a while on the blog. They won’t be the most eloquent or cohesive posts, but I think they’ll satisfy my need to record a few more memories.

And here’s one to start me off: Today, after he tried on the dragon costume I made him for Halloween, Griffin said, “I’m not a dragon anymore. I’m just a real boy.”

Our real boy dressed as a dragon.